First -
Moving is pretty terrible. But, we're almost out of one house and between the boxes, you can see the outlines to a nice home shaping up. Of course, we don't have internet yet, and just two days in our stovetop is broken and the dishwasher isn't working, but, hey, we're here. Both girls like this house, but at bedtime, Joy wants to go home. Me too honey, me too.
-
It's hard to have anyone else pack your stuff. It makes unpacking harder. It's more emotionally difficult to have family help you pack. Which is why I ended up in the closet crying twice this weekend. I appreciate the help tremendously. And still, I needed a cry. (control freak? or just hormonal? probably both)
My husband is amazing. He worked all weekend long getting things moved, and took yesterday off to start to get things settled here. And even in stressful situations, we work well together. This is good. Of course, I prefer to talk and play or just sit reading next to each other, but it's good to feel the closeness that can come from struggles.
More closet space doesn't always feel like more. Nothing fits like it used to.
Oh, and moving day, my mom said, hey, I think you've dropped. Um. Hmmm.
Which leads me to our current place in this pregnancy. If we were settled feeling, I think this baby would be here. We're both ready. And the contractions are getting stronger. I think my feeble mind (oh, please let me get settled a little more) won't hold him or her in much longer. (speaking of which, it's hard to move when pregnant, harder to move house.)
So. I'll be back when I can, hopefully with baby in arms, fewer boxes, internet, and a fully functional kitchen. Or maybe just one of those...
In the mean time, I feel terribly out of touch, but life is chaotic and full and I hope you are all well.
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
I'll place you on a brief silent hold...
Oh, the phone calls I've made, the frustrating people I've dealt with, the delays and delays and delays.... (and the wonderfully easy folks who say sure, we'll work around that, no problem, we can do this, why don't I do it today?) It's not all bad, just felt that way today.
I'm tired. And want to settle in, not box everything up. I'd like to walk without a waddle and the inevitable need to pull my pants back on. (oh, dear maternity clothing makers, don't you know we already feel ridiculous at this stage, why can't you create something that stays up? And don't get me started on all the dresses with skirts above the knees. Hello, I can't keep my knees together when I sit.) Today, my ankles disappeared. Bye. Sniff.
My girls were grumpy messes today. It's fair. We're been off on bedtime, and distracted and that leads to less nice behavior. I know what I need to do- focus on their needs for a few days. But the movers are coming and so are my in laws and things just can't be like this and.... Dang it. I put them to bed early. One down, the other stayed up and up and up. I don't know why! I even took a nap while singing lullabies. Go to sleep, my sweet babies.
So pardon me while the days rush by, and I try to knock a little off this to do mountain. Next week, we'll be in the new house (without Internet, because that's to hard for the phone company to do in one fell swoop) and within another week, we'll be done done done with this house. Painted and listed and dear god, please let it sell quickly. And then I'll be full term, and then a new chaos will descend. Oh, did I tell you Grace told her sister about how hard it was when mommy went to the hospital? And how Joy said, no, mommy will stay at home. No. Mommy will stay at home. I'm coming with you!!! This crazy timing was NOT the plan. But, I guess upheaval is life. Just teaching my kids to go with it, right?
Pardon me if I'm absent for the next couple of weeks. Likely the baby has nothing to do with it. Just boxes and houses and paint and in laws (oh my!). Hope your January is flowing more calmly -
I'm tired. And want to settle in, not box everything up. I'd like to walk without a waddle and the inevitable need to pull my pants back on. (oh, dear maternity clothing makers, don't you know we already feel ridiculous at this stage, why can't you create something that stays up? And don't get me started on all the dresses with skirts above the knees. Hello, I can't keep my knees together when I sit.) Today, my ankles disappeared. Bye. Sniff.
My girls were grumpy messes today. It's fair. We're been off on bedtime, and distracted and that leads to less nice behavior. I know what I need to do- focus on their needs for a few days. But the movers are coming and so are my in laws and things just can't be like this and.... Dang it. I put them to bed early. One down, the other stayed up and up and up. I don't know why! I even took a nap while singing lullabies. Go to sleep, my sweet babies.
So pardon me while the days rush by, and I try to knock a little off this to do mountain. Next week, we'll be in the new house (without Internet, because that's to hard for the phone company to do in one fell swoop) and within another week, we'll be done done done with this house. Painted and listed and dear god, please let it sell quickly. And then I'll be full term, and then a new chaos will descend. Oh, did I tell you Grace told her sister about how hard it was when mommy went to the hospital? And how Joy said, no, mommy will stay at home. No. Mommy will stay at home. I'm coming with you!!! This crazy timing was NOT the plan. But, I guess upheaval is life. Just teaching my kids to go with it, right?
Pardon me if I'm absent for the next couple of weeks. Likely the baby has nothing to do with it. Just boxes and houses and paint and in laws (oh my!). Hope your January is flowing more calmly -
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Lists and names (Calling all namers)
Everything I write turns into a list these days. Lists of things to do, people to call, things to find, checks to write, budgets, what to organize, where to put things, what else needs doing, what to add to the hospital bag, and on and on and on.
But I can't seem to write this list (which is driving my husband crazy) - top names for a baby.
You see, I'm kind of jaded on the whole name thing. We had a list when Grace came, but not one of the 10 names fit her. Well, five were for a boy, but still. They all felt to fluffy somehow. She came into the world so fiercely herself, so strong and so determined. I couldn't see those names on her. And so, they all went into the trash. I thought and thought. And somewhere in that first 24 hours of amazement and bewildering tears (poor baby couldn't get milk for a bit) her name came through to me. Clearly. Life felt like utter chaos when Joy was coming, and I just threw in the towel on the whole name thing, but this dear man of mine created lists which I just crossed off nearly everything from and somehow he doesn't remember that I didn't do a list. It wouldn't have mattered. Her name came about a day after she did too.
So, now, here we are. He needs a list. I'm pretty sure I won't stick to it even if I do have one and I don't have many names left (particularly of the girl variety). And that is where you come in, dear readers. Do you have any great name suggestions? (Think one to two syllables, simple names, kind of like Kate).
And while you're at it, is it terrible, just awful, to name someone a name that ends in the same letter that begins your last name? (Like Mabel Lewis - totally made up, by the way and clearly why I need help with this naming thing) Does it run together poorly? Is it worth kicking out the name of a dear family member? (This is actually a pointless argument. The name I want for a boy has been summarily shot down, and I guess thats okay, we both have power of veto.)
How did you name your kids? Do you think the 24 hour pattern will hold this time too? Oh, my goodness, I bet a could write a list of pointless questions. Don't you?
But I can't seem to write this list (which is driving my husband crazy) - top names for a baby.
You see, I'm kind of jaded on the whole name thing. We had a list when Grace came, but not one of the 10 names fit her. Well, five were for a boy, but still. They all felt to fluffy somehow. She came into the world so fiercely herself, so strong and so determined. I couldn't see those names on her. And so, they all went into the trash. I thought and thought. And somewhere in that first 24 hours of amazement and bewildering tears (poor baby couldn't get milk for a bit) her name came through to me. Clearly. Life felt like utter chaos when Joy was coming, and I just threw in the towel on the whole name thing, but this dear man of mine created lists which I just crossed off nearly everything from and somehow he doesn't remember that I didn't do a list. It wouldn't have mattered. Her name came about a day after she did too.
So, now, here we are. He needs a list. I'm pretty sure I won't stick to it even if I do have one and I don't have many names left (particularly of the girl variety). And that is where you come in, dear readers. Do you have any great name suggestions? (Think one to two syllables, simple names, kind of like Kate).
And while you're at it, is it terrible, just awful, to name someone a name that ends in the same letter that begins your last name? (Like Mabel Lewis - totally made up, by the way and clearly why I need help with this naming thing) Does it run together poorly? Is it worth kicking out the name of a dear family member? (This is actually a pointless argument. The name I want for a boy has been summarily shot down, and I guess thats okay, we both have power of veto.)
How did you name your kids? Do you think the 24 hour pattern will hold this time too? Oh, my goodness, I bet a could write a list of pointless questions. Don't you?
Monday, January 9, 2012
Rains
This morning, as we drove to school, thunder threatened, but the clouds were just low. Once we got home, they became dark. Dark enough to feel like night. And the rain started. Calmly at first, with big thunder. Then more fierce rains and darker skies.
Joy really wanted to watch Sid the Science Kid, and we turned out the tv. I checked the weather reports, almost by accident, and then I knew that I needed to watch for tornados and flooding. Oh goody.
As Kermit sang, the sky lightened to a sickening green. Green. Luckily, that was the worst. I kept my ears open and my eyes. Once the pets calmed down, I knew we were okay. The sky lightened. But the rain pours on. Our street is a river. But Sid is on, and we're okay.
I hope people stayed safe throughout our city. I hope by the time we go pick up Grace the waters have receded. I hope the workers at our new house are safe. (I also hope that house is well about the streams!) as the rain continues, I hope we stay dry!
The weather man called this a draught buster. Well. That's good. I hope.
Last night, we read the great last chapter of Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle's magic about a rainy day. It would be nice to find a big treasure on such a day as this. Gold and silver and jewels. Or warmth and love and family. Precious gems.
Joy really wanted to watch Sid the Science Kid, and we turned out the tv. I checked the weather reports, almost by accident, and then I knew that I needed to watch for tornados and flooding. Oh goody.
As Kermit sang, the sky lightened to a sickening green. Green. Luckily, that was the worst. I kept my ears open and my eyes. Once the pets calmed down, I knew we were okay. The sky lightened. But the rain pours on. Our street is a river. But Sid is on, and we're okay.
I hope people stayed safe throughout our city. I hope by the time we go pick up Grace the waters have receded. I hope the workers at our new house are safe. (I also hope that house is well about the streams!) as the rain continues, I hope we stay dry!
The weather man called this a draught buster. Well. That's good. I hope.
Last night, we read the great last chapter of Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle's magic about a rainy day. It would be nice to find a big treasure on such a day as this. Gold and silver and jewels. Or warmth and love and family. Precious gems.
Friday, January 6, 2012
Looking forward
Looking forward to calm and peace
Okay. Fine. That's too far away.
Looking forward to the narrow vision
that a new baby brings, swaddled.
Wrapped firmly in the timeless expanses.
Bound by the simple and constant.
Away from the silly house questions.
Away from the gazes and questions-
When? Really? When?!?! Boy or girl?
Tightly coiled with family, close, closer.
Forced to see only what matters.
Today, I'm participating in Six Word Fridays, check it out.
Okay. Fine. That's too far away.
Looking forward to the narrow vision
that a new baby brings, swaddled.
Wrapped firmly in the timeless expanses.
Bound by the simple and constant.
Away from the silly house questions.
Away from the gazes and questions-
When? Really? When?!?! Boy or girl?
Tightly coiled with family, close, closer.
Forced to see only what matters.
Today, I'm participating in Six Word Fridays, check it out.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Sappy
Oh, there are so many neat things to learn with a new house. Some more costly, others just fill my mind with more randomness.
Like pine beetles. We're lucky, our pines are healthy. But the arborist, who my husband had to have check the oak whose roots were cut for the plumbing repairs, gave me a quick lesson. Pines in Houston are battling beetles, and many too many are succumbing. Why? Well, normally, a healthy pine has so much sap that when a beetle tries to bore it's way in, the sap pushes it back out. Unfortunately, with our draught, too many pines are too dry. Without enough water, there isn't enough sap to keep the beetles out.
It's been a tough week for me. There are so many draws on my energy, I am feeling pulled and pressed and less capable of bouncing back. Last night, as I felt a contraction (and simultaneous terror, I'm not ready for this baby - we need the carseat at least), I felt a bit like a pine. You see, I haven't been conscientious enough about doing the things that nourish me. And without enough good inside, the small nuisances bore there way in more easily. And slowly, I turn from the joys, seeing only the problems.
So, last night, I put myself to bed early. This morning, I actively looked for the good, while finished a few tasks (like putting on different drawer pulls and packing away the last of the Christmas stuff ), and continued the constant ones - laundry, dishes, sweeping. Joy and I played a matching ducky game. Now I'm laying down and drinking water. Because I need to. It's not time for this baby to come out. Yet. Later, Joy and I will join Grace at school for lunch. Attention matters. This afternoon, between calls to switch out our new fridge for the right new fridge and scheduling the electrician and finishing homework and making dinner, I hope to slip a little yoga in. And then to bed early again. Because I want enough sap to keep out all those nasty beetles.
Like pine beetles. We're lucky, our pines are healthy. But the arborist, who my husband had to have check the oak whose roots were cut for the plumbing repairs, gave me a quick lesson. Pines in Houston are battling beetles, and many too many are succumbing. Why? Well, normally, a healthy pine has so much sap that when a beetle tries to bore it's way in, the sap pushes it back out. Unfortunately, with our draught, too many pines are too dry. Without enough water, there isn't enough sap to keep the beetles out.
It's been a tough week for me. There are so many draws on my energy, I am feeling pulled and pressed and less capable of bouncing back. Last night, as I felt a contraction (and simultaneous terror, I'm not ready for this baby - we need the carseat at least), I felt a bit like a pine. You see, I haven't been conscientious enough about doing the things that nourish me. And without enough good inside, the small nuisances bore there way in more easily. And slowly, I turn from the joys, seeing only the problems.
So, last night, I put myself to bed early. This morning, I actively looked for the good, while finished a few tasks (like putting on different drawer pulls and packing away the last of the Christmas stuff ), and continued the constant ones - laundry, dishes, sweeping. Joy and I played a matching ducky game. Now I'm laying down and drinking water. Because I need to. It's not time for this baby to come out. Yet. Later, Joy and I will join Grace at school for lunch. Attention matters. This afternoon, between calls to switch out our new fridge for the right new fridge and scheduling the electrician and finishing homework and making dinner, I hope to slip a little yoga in. And then to bed early again. Because I want enough sap to keep out all those nasty beetles.
Monday, January 2, 2012
Happy new year!
2012.
We celebrated with sparkling cider (for all us girls) and ice cream, early to bed for the girls and a special time for the two of us (who says you have to go out to have a date? Okay it would be nice, but really all I want is a place to cuddle, romantic lighting and maybe a bit of chocolate. Less these days. Oh, the agony!)
And then we woke to 2012 and my instincts went into crazy drive. I need this house clean NOW. Never mind that we're trying to organize four different contractors at the new place and that I need to move and it'd be good to sort things first and and and... No, right now, I need a peaceful and calm home. (Can you hear me shouting it? Oh, hormones.)
My husband looked at me at the end of the day (which of course included black eyed peas, because, good luck isn't something to be taken for granted) and sighed. His eyes said, who are you? I laughed. This is the first time he hasn't been traveling as I enter the nesting mania. Which is probably why he was all for three. I'm sure I'm not alone, but crazy is a nice term for me right about now.
It'd be better if my body worked. I might be less crazed if I weren't already having contractions (rarely) and feeling like this baby is low. I'm supposed to have six more weeks. Give or take. I'd certainly be happier if I could find those bitty baby clothes I saved. It's only a few items, but I adore them. And everything would be nicer if I slept. I'd be nicer. Not that I'm mean or crabby or demanding or anything. Of course not.
So, for the next few weeks, I'm juggling the demands of life to the bet of my ability. I've said I don't like juggling, right? I can't keep my eye on the right ball. I always drop something. But, you know what? The important things happen. They do. And sometimes you just have to let something drop.
All this crazy is almost enough to make me lose all perspective. Almost. But, yesterday we sat next to a family who's son was battling cancer. Today I heard my uncle is doing very poorly. We are all (knock on wood) healthy. And we are together. And all this chaos that whips up around me is a silly distraction from this beautiful, wonderful life.
We celebrated with sparkling cider (for all us girls) and ice cream, early to bed for the girls and a special time for the two of us (who says you have to go out to have a date? Okay it would be nice, but really all I want is a place to cuddle, romantic lighting and maybe a bit of chocolate. Less these days. Oh, the agony!)
And then we woke to 2012 and my instincts went into crazy drive. I need this house clean NOW. Never mind that we're trying to organize four different contractors at the new place and that I need to move and it'd be good to sort things first and and and... No, right now, I need a peaceful and calm home. (Can you hear me shouting it? Oh, hormones.)
My husband looked at me at the end of the day (which of course included black eyed peas, because, good luck isn't something to be taken for granted) and sighed. His eyes said, who are you? I laughed. This is the first time he hasn't been traveling as I enter the nesting mania. Which is probably why he was all for three. I'm sure I'm not alone, but crazy is a nice term for me right about now.
It'd be better if my body worked. I might be less crazed if I weren't already having contractions (rarely) and feeling like this baby is low. I'm supposed to have six more weeks. Give or take. I'd certainly be happier if I could find those bitty baby clothes I saved. It's only a few items, but I adore them. And everything would be nicer if I slept. I'd be nicer. Not that I'm mean or crabby or demanding or anything. Of course not.
So, for the next few weeks, I'm juggling the demands of life to the bet of my ability. I've said I don't like juggling, right? I can't keep my eye on the right ball. I always drop something. But, you know what? The important things happen. They do. And sometimes you just have to let something drop.
All this crazy is almost enough to make me lose all perspective. Almost. But, yesterday we sat next to a family who's son was battling cancer. Today I heard my uncle is doing very poorly. We are all (knock on wood) healthy. And we are together. And all this chaos that whips up around me is a silly distraction from this beautiful, wonderful life.
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